Finding Happiness in a Busy Life — “Make your bed every day”
It is 2014, Admiral William H. McRaven addressed the graduates of the University of Texas with a speech he has written entitled — What starts here changes the world. He has a simple message, ten lessons learnt from his navy seal training. He stands now in front of the graduates hoping to inspire the class of 2014 to change the world. His message however is about to go viral, to become a book and will inspire the lives of thousands around the world — including me.
Personally I graduated a long time ago, but this talk resonated still as I strive to change the world around me by finding happiness in it.
One of the things that makes me very happy is getting things done. I am sure I am not alone.
Did you ever seen an early ‘00s tv series called Dead Like Me starring Ellen Muth and Mandy Patinkin? In this series there was a character called Delores who — in her off hours — ran a live webcam show called Getting Things Done With Delores. People would log on to watch her get things done. (Fast forward to the 10s and we have a non-fictional similar version in Tidying Up with Marie Kondo.)
Getting things done makes me happy — not getting things done makes me unhappy and stressed, like for example not having finished this blog back six weeks ago when I started writing it!
I have tried various methods of dealing with the never ending todo lists; changing to done lists, using the Eisenhower matrix, trello boards, google tasks, fake deadlines and more. The only thing that powers through my do-to list like nothing else is a deadline. A real deadline, not a fake one, a real deadline — paired with procrastination. I get so many tasks completed, even those completely unrelated to the deadline tasks. For some reason a looming, immediate deadline triggers my “get everything done” button. Getting one thing done leads to another and another and another. So is there another way I can trigger this waterfall without a deadline?
Which leads me back to Admiral McRaven’s first lesson.
Lesson One:
Start each day with a task completed — make your bed every day.
I love this idea, it means that rather than starting the day failing by lack of achievement, you can start by achieving the first task of the day — making your bed. I decided to give it a go and see how it made me feel.
For the past few weeks I have endeavoured to make my bed everyday. I have made it most days, including today before I got up early to complete this blog post. Days when I awoke so early to get other things done that my husband was still sleeping — I didn’t make my bed. The tasks I completed before he awoke satisfied just the same. It is the act of completing tasks early in the day which then sets you up for the day ahead. Sets up you to complete another task, and another and another. It doesn’t have to be making your bed, it could be anything else. Importantly though, the task has to be completable i.e.; small enough that you can complete within a short time frame to avoid getting distracted, easy enough that you can finish it without needing help from others; and defined enough so you can complete without a lot of research that can lead to long segues. Not only have I discovered that I work best by Deadline Driven Achievement (DDA) but I also have a scatterbrain which means I am easily segued!
Making your bed is a task that ticks all those boxes. Making your bed, however, has other benefits that contribute to a sense of wellbeing and happiness. I will quote the admiral here as he puts is so concisely.
“If by chance you have a miserable day you will come home to a bed that is made, that you made. And a made bed gives encouragement that tomorrow will be better.”
So, if you have missed making your bed as your first task completed for the day — don’t despair. Make it now. You will feel a sense of accomplishment, a sense of pride. When the rest of your house or your life is a mess, you walk into your bedroom and see that made bed — you can take a deep breath in and know that at least you have one thing done today. And at the end of your day slipping into a crisp, soft, made bed is like nothing else to envelope your whole self in sense of wellbeing and comfort to reset your body and allow your brain to finish the day knowing that you did achieve something today — you made your bed.
If you have not seen the speech, watch for yourself, but better yet read the book, I encourage each and everyone of you to do so. It’s an easy read and a fast listen if you prefer your books on audio — you can accomplish the task in one 60 minute road trip.
The other lessons from Admiral McRaven with time markers:
- Start each day with a task completed.(Making your bed 4:43)
2. Find someone to help you through life. (Row together 6:14)
3. Respect everyone.(The Munchkins 7:28)
4. Know that life is not fair. (“Sugar Cookie” 8:38)
5. You will fail often. (The circus 10:04)
6. Take some risks. (New record, head first 11:30)
7. Face down the bullies. (Sharks 12:52)
8. Step up when the times are toughest. (The dark keel 14:02)
9. Lift up the downtrodden. (Song of hope 15:38)
10. Never ever give up. (Don’t ring that bell 17:50)
